The torrid seduction of a temptress by a ruler who risk all for his uncontrollable lustful desires, When David Met Bathsheba, has the making of America's next big smash reality series! Governor Mark Sanford is the candidly lustful ruler who embarks on a journey of sex, sin and unbridled passion in the sultry pleasure pits of Buenos Aires with his illicit princess of passion, Maria.The first three episodes have taken America by storm! The governor disappears for a week and a nation suspects the worse.
Betrayed by his guilt and religion, he begs the citizens of the Great State of South Carolina for forgiveness. Will he stay or will he go?
In tonights episode, the Governor has a message from God telling him that he must stay and not give into his lustful pride. God tells him that it would be too easy to leave.
God says that is is his plan. Governor Sanford must stay in office because it is God's Plan!
Then, well, he admits to having other affairs with other temptresses and in spite of the fact that Maria is his soulmate, well, maybe he could try to fall in love with his wife again.....but then there's Maria, beckoning to him from the sultry steamy tango clubs of Buenos Aires, with a flower in her perfumed hair....
Meanwhile, back at the Governors Mansion, Mrs. Sanford gets a call from Michelle Obama who says, "Hey Girl, I hear your husbands mistress is so fat he just sticks a Segway handlebars up her ass and rides her clear across the Pampas yodelin' like a hyena!"
Mrs. Sanford, who is cruising on her third Percodan of the afternoon, smiles pleasantly and asks,"Which one?"
Personally, I hope he stays!
4 comments:
Hello Microdot,
Here is where you are at your best. You put a smile on my face with the great art work, and kept it on with your wit in your writings. As you know, I was stationed in Charleston S.C. as a young man. I know well the type of bible bangers in South Carolina that will swallow this con man’s crap so long as he continues to quote scripture.
Good job my friend and keep up the good work.
"God says that is is his plan. Governor Sanford must stay in office because it is God's Plan!"
Just imagine how many men have pimped God through the ages by that same declaration.
It goes to show just how gullible 'churchy' people are.
As you know, it is my theory [a doctoral dissertation waiting to be written]that the mind of the evangelical, fundamentalist, the 'believer' is much-less skeptical than it ought to be. Their mind is wide-open, like a door ajar, awaiting the knock of the salesman.
The shysters and miscreants are fully aware of this genetic defect [or meme-void] and easily and gleefully prey/pray upon this weakness.
Do we pity them or castigate them?
We can pity them only up to the point when they begin to interfere with the governance of this nation. As we have sadly seen, their political agenda is never in the interest of the common man, the ordinary citizen of this nation. It is bellicose, war-like, aggressive- just like the 'god' of the OT. The 'god' who 'told them' that he wished them to slay entire villages, ravish the land in 'his' name.
That is where we, as citizens of this democracy, must speak out and expose their thoroughly un-American agenda.
And I do!
and then I gets to depants them for a good spanking!
it wasn't sanfor's fault. His "family values" were destroyed by liberal abortion laws, the use of condoms instead of abstinence, and homo sexual marriage.
All those things led him astray, and messed up Gov. Sanford's marriage. Damn it!! He's just a victim of our liberal society.
Just ask any mindless fundie right wing, jesus sucking, young earth Creationism believing, limbaugh dittoing, bible banging fucktard.
Ah...that felt better.
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