Route 666

After getting serially spammed by several demented chrisitans who want me to be saved and read their mind manipulating blogs, I was inspired to consider a career move and I'm doing a little research as to a new metier that might prove to be more exciting and profitable and as I keep hearing the fundamentalist christians referring to an anti christ, I think that after a bit of research, I am ready to submit my job application. I discovered that they've been going on about anti-christs of one sort or another for centuries, since 70 AD as far as I can see.

An anti christ was supposed to destroy Jerusalem then, but didn't and the next time the job position was open was around 1000 AD, which was considered an apocalyptic date, so the expectations were high, but no applicants came forward.

Again around 1120 Ad, in the obscure text, The Vaudois Church, there is mention of the anit christ and the effect of creating "moral turpitude, but not much more.

In 1260, Joachim announced that the anti christ was already born and the last days of the world had begun...that was 800 years ago and we are still in the last days of Joachim, I guess.

In 1520, though, Luther claimed that the anti christ was not just one person, but an institution, beginning a long tradition of fundamentalists labeling anything they didn't like as the anti christ, there by making it ok to hate it and destroy it.

So, the catholic church became the anti christ.

In 1585, the protestants refined the idea that it wasn't the entire catholic church, just the "papacy".  Meanwhile, the Jesuits counter charged that the anti christ was definitely not catholic and would be one person who had a great personality and was probably very entertaining...and could cause moral turpitude...Yeah! I am really qualified for Moral Turpitude, or at least, I am quick learner.....

The anti christ was supposedly mentioned in 1846 to some spaced out peasants who reportedly saw the virgin Mary in France. This time, the anti christ was definitely going to be catholic...More points in my favor as I was definitely baptized as a catholic, went to a catholic grade school and had my head pounded against a tile wall by a demented nun.

For some reason, the date Febuary 5, 1962 became fixated upon as the birthdate of the anti christ. People sharing this birthdate are Bill Gates and my dentist.

Fundamentalist christians claimed that John F. Kennedy was the anti christ, Mikail Gorbachev was the anti christ..Jerry Falwell before he O.D.ed on fried foods claimed the anti christ was alive and  was a jewish guy in Queens named Larry.

Barack Obama is supposed to be the anti christ because of his Chicago Zip Code, which proves it beyond the shadow of a doubt to many well informed evangelicals...

I dunno, does the job pay well? The job description says that the anti christ has to be highly likable, reasonably talented and an atheist or what ever and capable of causing great moral turpitude... I can do that. I mean, people seem to like me, I really like to sing, I can dance pretty good and play a number of musical instruments. I'm not religious in the least and more than a little intrigued by this moral turpidtude thing. I would like to see the dissolution of organized religion, but I'd really be a reasonable kind of anti-christ.

I'd be willing to take alternate Sundays. The fundamentalists could get every other Sunday, if they didn't want to listen to me on my Sundays, they could organize a bowling league or take up mah-jhong. All the other people who wanted to hear my message of moral turpitude are welcome....

Now, the next thing I want to find out about is the vacations and BONUSES!